In the thick of it, you wonder if your child will ever heal from reactive attachment disorder. I know—it’s not easy. Sometimes the raging, stealing, lying, or hurtful words just feel like too much. Like it’ll never end.
Take a deep breath and let me tell you a little story…
The Moment of Hope for My Son
My 16-year-old son came to me one day. He had something to say about my relationship with my biological son—
“Mom, sometimes I am so jealous of you and Joe. You have a strong rope holding you together. You and I only have a string. But it’s okay,” he said “because someday, that string will be enough to help me build a rope with my own kids.”
My jaw dropped—such insight and wisdom from my young man. His year had been filled with deep depression and an inability to see beyond his small, immediate world.
My son’s words gave me bright hope in the middle of the nightmare we had been living. We watched as mental illness and attachment issues consumed him in his late teens. Maybe he actually understood all the things we strived to teach him. And most importantly—perhaps he understood how very much we love him.
Was it possible?
I can tell you now, far on the other side of those dark days, that he did understand our guidance and love. But in that time and place, he was too overwhelmed to live as if he did.
When You Wonder What the Future Holds for Your Child
May is Mental Health Awareness Month. We, as parents of children with attachment issues, are on the forefront of the battlefield.
Sometimes, it’s hard for us to remember that we’re not battling our children. Rather, we’re battling their disorders. Attachment disorder is one that slaps us in the face, pees and poops on our floors and in our vents, poisons our coffee, curses us, and says horrible things about us. In short, attachment disorder is just plain mean. You can’t take it personally—but that’s not usually easy.
Hang in there. You are truly making a difference for your child. Your child relies on your consistency and caring so that he or she can heal. Stick with it, continue to educate yourself about attachment disorder, and don’t give up hope.
Inspire other parents…when was the moment you first realized that your child was healing?
Or…share your frustration with us and other parents. We’re here to offer support and advice.
Image courtesy of Idea go / FreeDigitalPhotos.net